Friends, I have a giant in my life. A situation that keeps rearing its massive, ugly head, over and over again. It has a loud booming voice but also knows how to whisper when I am trying to rest. My giant has got me out of bed at 3am, forcing me to my knees. I have begged God to take it away but He hasn’t. Instead, maddeningly, He has reminded me again and again how this situation is for my good. That this giant is, and has, set me free of idol worship, loving things, loving people and the praise of man more than the approval of God (John 5:44). I have spent years wrestling with this giant. In the early days the giant was so terrifying I’d crumble every single time it even looked in my direction. I’d battle it in my own strength, be defeated and sent running with my tail between my legs to, dejectedly, lick my wounds. I then decided to avoid the giant entirely, stay as far away as possible, all the while keeping one eye on the giant because, dang it, don’t you know it has a thing for me. Nothing helped. The fear has morphed into a weary acceptance. It is a thing of sorrow and a constant reminder of my helpless estate. Now, I am being forced to approach the giant to face him at last. I am a very reluctant hero, unlike our hero of the faith, David. You are probably very familiar with the story of David and Goliath. Even if you are a nominal Christian, or not even a Christian, you know this story. I have been reading Tony Evan’s book: The Power of God’s Names and I am going to personalize what Tony Evan writes about the story found in 1 Samuel 17, where he expands on the power in the name David uses to apply to God: “The LORD of Heaven’s Armies.”

Tony Evan talks about American football a lot and he describes what David did as ‘a winning play’. The winning play is to hand over control to God and to trust Him for the power to overcome. What if you don’t trust Him for the power to overcome? Well, then you become what I am. Drained, afraid, with no ability to approach, or shrink back. I have no good options. I know I can’t rely on myself because I know I don’t have what it takes but I don’t know if I can rely on God to conquer this giant either. Why wouldn’t God allow me be humiliated and disgraced? I’ll be honest that I think: ‘it is not like that hasn’t happened before’. I am frequently disgraced by this giant.’ Every time I have approached this giant in the past, I land up flat on my back with the wind knocked out of me. But something is shifting. I can sense it. When I look at the giant, I am noticing signs of fatigue: his grip on his club seems a little less firm. He has a wariness in his eyes when he watches me. He still taunts me but the taunts have lost their sting. Also there is another guy here with me. He seems utterly unfazed by the giant. He reminds me what I do have. He reminds me to look at the giant a little more closely and with a little more objectivity. This guy has been feeding me chunks of bread and sips of water from his supply. He has rubbed oil on my hands, arms and shoulders. He has been coaching me. I listened half-heartedly in the beginning, grabbing half of what he said and then making a quick dart at the giant. Each time I would be defeated and my Coach would say: “you didn’t do what I told you. This battle has to be fought with a particular strategy. Weapons that make sense to you, won’t work on this giant”. He motivates me and says, “You can do this”. When I want to give up, He says, “No, come here, remember what I’ve been saying. Look at the giant, he is exposed on his left flank. He favors his right leg. You are a champion, not because you are large, or fast, or clever, but because of whose you are”. When I forgot (forget), and I try do battle my way, wham, back I go staring up at the sky overhead. Every defeat has caused me to look up. Every defeat has made me listen more closely to my Coach, drink more deeply of the water and eat more determinedly from the bread He offers me. I want so much to believe that I am a champion. I want to believe that I can conquer this giant but there is another voice telling me that this giant is just another one of those things I have to suffer in life in order to gain the character I am so obviously missing. Sounds true too. When I listen to the other voice I become so confused. When I listen to my Coach, it is so clear what I need to do.